"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God." Hebrews 12:1-2
Saturday morning I was training for a race that I am planning to run. It was a long one, so I had lots of time to think. (Those of you who know me well are probably laughing because you know I already think too much. So, maybe I should say, time to think clearly. :) ) As I got to about the half way point I was ready to quit. The hills were feeling longer and steeper and no one would know if I decided to walk. So, I slowed down and started to walk. It felt good for a second, I had given up. So, I gave myself a pep talk: "Sarah, you have been training for this and you can do it...it's gonna hurt until the end, but it's worth it."
Picked up one foot and then the other and up the hill I went. I got to the top and then I got to go down. Ahhhhh! Down. Now, that was worth it....until I got to the next one. But the next one was different because I remembered the joy of sticking to it and reaching the top last time.
God works in our lives this way. Doesn't he? When we choose to fix our eyes on Jesus, he writes our story and perfects our faith by bringing us to the bottom of the hill saying climb with me. And while we climb the Holy Spirit helps us throw off the stuff, the everything that hinders and sin that entangles. With his help we put one foot in front of the other and we throw off that stuff, (pride, fear, comparison, not loving our neighbor......) and we chose the joy and freedom he set before us because he endured the cross.
We can say no though. We can choose not to climb the hill, turn around or just sit down and not go because throwing off what entangles us is hard. Or maybe we are just comfortable the way things are. It is 'working' why change it? This is my biggest hang up. Sometimes life is not comfortable or working, but is predictable and I feel like I can control the outcome. I like control. I like it a lot more than I even realized. I am crying out "Lord, I believe; help my unbelief!" Because belief, I am learning, is not a feeling it is a choice.
So, I sat down to write why you should come to IF: Local at Providence CRC and this is what came out instead. I can't decide if the IF conference was a climbing experience for me or a soaring down the other side of the hill experience. It was both I guess. The Spirit was so present there that I cried the minute I walked through the doors. (Seriously, ask the girls I went with.) Jennie Allen started by saying something about feeling like she and the leaders of IF blew a dog whistle and people came running. We didn't know what IF was all about and neither did they really. She knew that God was calling her to gather and equip women. Asking the tough questions together, like what is holding us back and what are our gifts and are we good enough?
At IF I heard this: God is calling us. He is calling us to run our race with our eyes fixed on him. We get to cry out "JESUS!" when we feel like we want to turn around or sit down and say no. We are not capable or able to walk, let alone run up our hill without him. Doing the hills without him I have found is pointless. And honestly, when I get to the next one I do get to remember his faithfulness from the last climb so it is still hard, but somehow sweeter.
If you choose to come to IF at Providence, you will get to hear that message too. You will also have time to sit and figure out a few things about yourself in the process. Good things, great things...and things that are entangling you.
Some of you don't need this experience, that's ok. But I am praying that if God is tugging your heart strings with even a little curiosity, you will consider it. It grew me. Jesus met me there. I will never regret it.
